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Tom Hanks receives the Presidential Medal of Freedom (U.S. Government)

At some point in time, I imagine we’ve all had at least one “Say it ain’t so” moment where we found ourselves genuinely disappointed by something a celebrity did or said. It’s practically an inevitable part of growing up, as when you idolize people you don’t actually know, you’re all but guaranteed to be let down at some point along the way. One day you’re singing along to their latest party anthem, the next they’re getting arrested for assault. One day they’re co-starring in the greatest comedic film trilogy of all time, the next they’re leading a low-speed police chase…


There comes a time in everyone’s life where they find themselves looking back on what might have been. Things they should or shouldn’t have done, things they should or shouldn’t have said. Opportunities that passed us by, and sadly, never returned.

Of course, when I say this, the first thing that comes to mind is the Coming Out of Their Shells tour, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles live-action concert experience that traveled throughout North America in 1990 and 1991. …


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Photo by Joel Muniz on Unsplash

I’m not proud to admit this, but the percentage of my life I’ve devoted to thinking about going back in time is truly staggering. I don’t anticipate it ever happening, mind you, and honestly my fingers are crossed that it never does, as being a time traveler of color, going back any significant period of time means things really start getting exponentially worse in a hurry (I once told a White friend that I often wondered what I could do, if I went back in time, that would impress everyone I saw. He responded “If you went back in time?”…


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Photo by BP Miller on Unsplash

While most of my interests have waxed and waned in intensity throughout the years (I assume that’s generally the way people’s interests go), my love of music is one that has remained strong since childhood. Whether I’m reading the stories behind my favorite songs or racking my brain to create the perfect playlist, the countless forms of music appreciation permanently reside at the front of my mind.

These days, my music consumption is largely reserved for times I’m driving somewhere, and try as Spotify might to help me stay in tune with emerging artists, I’m comfortable admitting that my tastes…


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“Karate kick at sunrise” by bluesbby is licensed under CC BY 2.0

New Year’s Day marked the Season 3 premiere of Cobra Kai on Netflix, the perfect way to celebrate what’s regarded by many as one of the laziest days of the year (On a personal note, I recently transferred from Team “Up and at em! New Year, New Me.” to Team “Why didn’t I go to bed earlier? I’m going to feel like trash all day. And for what, Carson Daly? Oh lord, why don’t I respect myself?”). …


We’ve got the days off, let’s celebrate the right people

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Christopher Columbus Statue Torn Down at Minnesota State Capitol, photo by Tony Webster

Last summer, countless Americans took to the streets in the name of long overdue social change. In the midst of these demonstrations, statues of several prominent figures were brought to the ground and destroyed, frustrated citizens refusing to sit by as the nation celebrated time-honored symbols of oppression and hate.

In addition to statues, sports teams and syrup mascots, American holidays are currently facing unprecedented scrutiny as well, and while some may disagree, I believe that many long-standing holidays have long overstayed their welcome. That said, simply cancelling them would be a mistake, and a failure to capitalize upon what…


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If you’ve ever considered investing in the stock market (or going in on that pyramid scheme your kind-of acquaintance from high school sent to you on Facebook), you should be well aware that past results do not necessarily guarantee future success. Just because something worked once, you can’t be 100% certain that it’s going to work as well if you try it again, and that applies to most pursuits in life, not just financial ones. One day in Canada, for example, Mr. and Mrs. Gretzky got together and created their son Wayne, who scored an NHL-record 2,857 career points. …


Cultural appropriation you can dance to

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Photo by Johnathan Ciarrocca on Unsplash

Say you’re having a conversation with someone about your respective family trees, and that person says they’re pretty much Dutch or Irish or whatever, but they’re also a little Native American — maybe something like 1/16th Native American on their mother’s side. Well, not to call your hypothetical friend a liar, but there’s a chance that they might have been misinformed.

You see, many people who think they’re part Native American really aren’t Native American at all, and the belief that they are is a little phenomenon often referred to as “Cherokee Syndrome.” Someone demonstrating Cherokee Syndrome believes or pretends…


This Is Us

When the time to ‘sit back and unwind’ never arrives

Two Black people sitting outside at a small, round table with cold drinks on it.
Two Black people sitting outside at a small, round table with cold drinks on it.
Illustration: Mike Shirdan and Joey McIntosh

Many years ago, I decided that I would no longer subscribe to the standard concept of “seasons” as we know them, choosing instead to simply determine my own. I’m aware that days of the year aren’t really up for interpretation or debate, but the seasons’ official start and end dates (at least here in the mid-Atlantic United States) never seem to have any real connection to anything anyway — much of winter remains fairly warm, spring is too cold, it’s all a big mess. With that in mind, I followed my own designations and never looked back. And my first…


Love is love, and everybody loves chicken

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(Photo by Hello I'm Nik 🎞 on Unsplash)

As far back as I can remember, I always wanted to write a commercial for a fast food establishment specializing in reasonably priced chicken sandwiches.

I don’t really know how to get into that business, and I’ve conducted zero research on the subject, so I’m just going to post the script right here. If you sell chicken sandwiches and would like to use it for your next commercial (it doesn’t have to run during the Super Bowl but I’d recommend it), just let me know and I’ll tell you where to send the check.

The commercial begins with an exterior…

Chris Rosenthall

You may know me as Joe the policeman in the What's Going Down episode of That's My Momma.

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